Six Characters in Search of a Blogger


9.3 I Could Have Been: An Outdoor Girl

pale, busty, clumsy.

Kate Winslet's indoor girl.

Jack: You ever, uh, you ever been to Wisconsin? 

Rose: What? 

Jack: Well, they have some of the coldest winters around. I grew up there, near Chippewa Falls. I remember when I was a kid, me and my father, we went ice fishing out on Lake Wissota. Ice fishing is, you know, where you… 

Rose: I know what ice fishing is! 

Jack: Sorry. You just seem like, you know, kind of an indoor girl.   (Emphasis mine)

 

 

I failed the flexed arm hang during the Presidential Fitness test in grade school.

I failed the flexed arm hang during the Presidential Fitness test in grade school.

Anybody else remember this dialogue between Kate Winslet and Leonardo DiCaprio in Titanic?  I remember it distinctly, because I blushed when I heard it.  Like Kate Winslet’s character Rose, I am a total indoor girl–complete with the translucently pale white skin, the bustiness, and the propensity to trip and fall at inappropriate times.  

No doubt if I had been on that ship that fateful (and fictional) night, I would have been dangling off the side of the Titanic.  But, before Jack had a chance to decide whether or not to save my rather large and approaching-middle-aged ass, heck, before I could even get the words “help, help” out of my throat, I’d likely be a goner.  Because my palms tend to sweat in stressful situations, and I have absolutely NO upper body strength (I still remember the shame of failing the flexed arm hang in grade school during the Presidential Fitness exams.)  So kerplunk!  I would have been the first casualty of that tragic voyage.  The girl who fell off the Titanic before it sank.

So imagine my surprise this week when I found out I have a doppelganger in the world who spends her life outside in the elements.  She is a naturalist.  She has sailed across the Atlantic in a 6 person boat.  She has climbed a live volcano.  She has hiked, biked, paddled, climbed, camped and skied across the U.S., Asia, Africa, Central America, and Canada.

She is the consummate outdoor girl.

If I were an outdoor girl, I would have climbed Mount Kenya.  (For those who know me, try not to laugh too hard.)

If I were an outdoor girl, I would have climbed Mount Kenya. (For those who know me, try not to laugh too hard.)

Now, I have made attempts to be more of an outdoor girl.  A couple of years ago, I climbed to the top of Mount Battie in Camden, Maine (all 780 feet of it) and had to descend on my butt.

In my defense, it was a big, bald rock that was pretty steep in places.  

And I do have a tendency to fall.

To put my accomplishment in perspective, a couple of years ago, she (my alter ego) climbed more than 17,000 feet to the top of Mount Kenya.

So I guess she wins the doggie biscuit.

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